This is an unabashedly sentimental entry.
The thing is, ya'll, I am a guy's gal. I don't care how often I wear 5 inch heels. I don't care how well I can apply make up or read body language or that I kinda like astrology. I get along better with men. There's less drama. There's less competition. And there's less concern over when your female supposed-bestie is going to use a situation against you and justify it because of her emotions (re: her clitoris). I'm not saying I'm not guilty of the same damn things, but isn't that the issue? We wage this warfare against ourselves, against our own KIND, and that's why men rule the world. They don't discriminate as far as gender when it comes to wanting to dominate. We do.
I think this is kinda why I have a history of living with gamer boys and punk boys. I think this is why I find bi guys really attractive--a little bit of woman in a whole lot of man. I think this why I always end up being like every other girl, disappointed and hurt with a story of a former best friend, a SOUL SISTER, that did her wrong. It's just how it goes.
While I don't find it hard to make friends with women, I definitely find it hard to keep friendships with them. Love isn't enough. Not bullshitting them isn't enough. Something is going to come between you, and frankly, it probably made at least one of you cum. It's a tragedy, really; nearly worth of Shakespeare, if Portia would let something like that bullshit happen. (Ophelia, oddly enough, couldn't be revived for comment.)
But yeah, no, cute little quips aside, the way I cherish my schladies is sacred to me. Because in my life are some beautiful, hardcore, blunt, badass women. And every single day, I cherish the fact that these people love me. Because their love is proof positive that maybe, maybe, I'm learning to do something right. I feel that time after time of disappointment has simply been the process of weeding out those who will damage and keep me from growing. I left all the chaff behind and damn, can I just say? I got the creme de la creme. Ya'll should be jellyfish to the extreme or alternately, eternally grateful that you have these women in your life as well. I'm just sayin'.
I have a Superhero Friend who's willing to pull my Instead Cup out of me. I only get one, but still. C'mon!
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I have a very recent addition to my love fest. We met at trivia, we were interested in the same guy (unbeknownst to her) and he played games by being interested in one then the other without ever telling her what the score was (btw, I knew. It didn't end well.). We can both see past that, which is RARE. We should hate each other. Instead? We sing Vanilla Ice Cream by Stephen Lynch on repeat while going on Adventures. We talk and text every day and see each other most days. She drove me to the St. Patrick's Day Party where I took a shot every time the guy I had invited said something that irritated me (I will post a picture of the ensuing bruise once I get around to putting that moment down to posterity). She also drove me home, an act which has earned her a fucking medal.
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I have college Friend. She stuck with me through the The Gail Encounter (see Rebounds Can Be Ugly. for more details.) She has seen me through my gutter punk ex, the military ex, horrible roommates, dropping out of college, and a million other undignified moments in my post-pubescent life. She is a continuous source of encouragement, love, positive energy, and love. I can't imagine my life without her and I am so proud of her every success.
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This is a quote from a friend, a conversation we had drunkenly in the bathroom at my Usual Bar:
"I ran into Superhero Friend at Dropkick Murphy's and we were talking about how brutally honest you are, and how it sometimes hurts our feelings, but you know, that's why we love you."
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I have a non-biological sister who has been a continual presence in my life for 20 years. She is everything I could ever ask for from family. She is beautiful, smart, a wonderful mother, person, and friend. Everyone is continually astonished by her and I don't blame them. She is better than anyone I will ever know and that's just facts.
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I have a best friend who is always there to pick my ass up and I am there to pick hers up. The distance between us is irrelevant but sucks. We take joy in the time we spend together on the phone, texting, facebooking; hell, even thinking about how the people I'm physically with aren't as good as her ends up being a great night because I get to remember all the things we've been through. Driving for six hours straight to pick up a phone that was an hour away. Our exes. Sangria from the grocery store. Going to her apartment after I was stuck in a barracks room for 21 days. She is my other half. I don't know how I got this lucky.
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Me: Oh, honey. I go through The Mens like cheap vodka on 2 dollar well nights.
Her: cheers to that. eventually you'll get stuck on one. then you'll get so goddamn drunk.
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I have a friend who wants to write a memoir together when we hit our mid thirties. We have lived some shit. She gave her boyfre'n a Plan B box filled with conversation hearts for Valentine's Day while I was sitting around trying to be super casual with the guy shit didn't work out with.
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And on and on it goes. I could keep posting our conversations, but you know who you are. And I have said before, and I'll say it again, you guys help make me realise that I have to be doing something right. I have friends like you who keep me on my toes and love me anyway. Because it's like you guys see into the heart of all the stupid ass things I do and understand that I'm just trying to make it through.
Oh god, ya'll, that's the best part.
My friends get me.
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